Welcome to the You, You Won’t Face.

When I heard this, I had to write it down. I knew it would become the title of my post. You have to admit that aside from how catching it actually is, it really pulls and forces you to look within. In all my recent post which I class as motivational posts, you will have noticed that I have been honing in on looking within. Catching up on one of my favourite podcast, Impact theory, I listened to the interviewee Lauren Zander as she talked about who she was and what she did (Life Coach), the Co-Founder and Chairwoman of the Handel Group. She is also the author of Maybe Its You… This very phrase that she stated stuck out to me. It is the very thing that I took away from that podcast.

Sometimes It Gets Personal

I always want my post to be as relatable as possible which means that there are times where it will veer more to my personal life in one way or the other. I do not want this post to be just another motivational post telling you to get up and do whatever it is that you wish to do. Essentially, those kind of post or motivational speeches are not wrong. They are telling you the truth without all the fluff around it. Sometimes you just need to get up and do it.

Lets Start from the Beginnig

However, that is not what I want to be addressing in this post. I want to talk about the beginning stages. The inner dialogue, your chatterbox as it is sometimes referred to. How does your inner dialogue go? Generally, I am a positive person. I don’t see the point in being negative. It highlights the problem which I already know and just brings me down, even more, I do not need that. It is easy to think then that I will be able to have a good inner dialogue. Sometimes I do and sometimes I don’t. Although I am happy to say this happens less as I keep practising and focusing on more positive things, which begins right from the moment I wake up to the time I go to bed. I start with thanking God for a blessed day and end on the same note. Practising gratitude does wonder. Of course, we can not forget confidence in oneself.

If there is no enemy within the enemy without can do you know harm –

African Proverb

My Inner Dialogue

Nevertheless being a positive person can come across annoying and even offensive to some. There used to be times where I found myself keeping smmicch because, in my head, my inner dialogue was this. “Nobody wants to hear what you have to say, they are literally going to roll their eyes with your forever glass is half-full attitude, they will think your insensitive to their plight”, I could go on. And I have had such reactions. I met with an old friend from school last year, and in conversation, we happen to talk about why we had drifted apart over the years. Figuring we were all adult and could have a grown honest conversation, I told her that I had pulled back from the friendship due to her constant complaints and negativeness. Needless to say, she did not take it well and I doubt we will be meeting up any time soon.

I Learned A Lesson

You may be thinking, maybe it is the way you said it. Yes, I am quite a blunt person but I am not insensitive, this much I can, in that conversation the onus was on me to have taken the time to try and understand her and her situation a lot more and see where I could have helped rather than pull back. This is a lesson learned for me when it comes to navigating my friendships.

Actions and Reactions

This is not to say that she did not have a reason to complain or be negative she really did, However every time we spoke, if it wasn’t this it was that. I want my friends to be able to come to me confidently and talk to me about anything going on in their life, positively or negatively, and I also understand that there is a period of wallowing in self-pity and “woe is me”. Call me and I will listen. But after a while please let us be honest with ourselves, what are you doing about it? Are you facing YOU? Or are you pointing fingers and blaming everyone else. You cannot at no point control other peoples actions but you can completely control your reaction and how you choose to move forward.

Now it’s your turn

I hope that by now you can deduce what I am trying to convey in this post. It all starts with you, continues with you, and ends with you. If you are a constant denominator in a recurring situation, then like they say; Maybe It’s You…. There is the you, you won’t face for all of us. I have one, actually, I have multiples, there’s the timid, the stubborn, too open, the one who wants to do everything but sometimes just need to have several seats. Slowly but surely I am working on them because I love me and I want to live my best life with my best me. I employ every one reading this to think this post through and I really hope to have sparked a conversation within.

Comments

omment below anything you have been putting off that you decided to face. For me, I need to say no confidently, without the guilt that sometimes comes with it, even though I know its the right thing to do.

Have a great week 😀

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